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	<title>Middle East &#8211; Nicholas Walker</title>
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	<link>https://www.nicholaswalker.co.uk</link>
	<description>Bestselling author, scientist, teacher, dance and karate instructor</description>
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	<title>Middle East &#8211; Nicholas Walker</title>
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		<title>Going Crackers in Kuwait</title>
		<link>https://www.nicholaswalker.co.uk/product/going-crackers-in-kuwait-2/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Nicholas Walker]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 26 Sep 2020 20:40:45 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[One day we were going to a big market in Kuwait City. I was sitting in the front with Emad driving and in the back were Tammy and Steve, the English couple from the school. We were going through the outskirts and it was quite busy with pedestrians everywhere, almost like a Western city except the people would tend to wander out into the street without warning. And the cars come to that. Suddenly my gaze became transfixed. I sat forward.

‘Hat!’ I shouted. ‘Hat! Hat! Hat!’ Emad stared at me a concerned expression on his face.

‘Dr Nick?’ he said.

‘Stop the car…quick! Quick!’ I shouted flinging the door wide. ‘Pick me up just up the road!’ I pointed ahead and took off up the street. I ran quietly as I could in and out of the milling crowds and came up right behind the tall black African. He was wearing this huge, turban shaped, leather hat…ooo, it was magnificent! It had strings and buckles and a peak! I leapt high in the air, swept it from his head and took off like Usain Bolt. There came an outraged cry from behind but much faster than I expected I heard feet pounding in pursuit and more worryingly, others seemed to be joining in. I cut off into the road putting the hat on my head for safe keeping and the cries from behind became even more outraged. Then, just when things were getting a mite fraught the Caddy swung alongside and Tammy was holding the door open for me. I dived in and waved the hat out the window at my pursuers.

Of course, Tammy and Steve were English so they didn’t deign to comment on my entirely understandable actions and Emad was doing his best to look relaxed but he kept shooting glances at my new hat.

It was the following day before he finally broke, ‘Dr Nick,’ he said chidingly, ‘if you had wanted a hat that badly I would have taken you somewhere and bought you one!’

&#160;]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The fourth travelogue in this best-selling series of the trouble prone eccentric who is not quite sane. Nick runs away from a mad woman in America and somehow ends up in Kuwait teaching at a posh school. But this is Nick and things never go easily for Nick! He is adopted by a dirt poor Arab family from a persecuted sect and takes up the cause of the Bedoon, he opens an illegal dance club and he terrorises the local barber. His hilarious antics as he gets flung into jail with an expectorating guard, as he dismantles a speed camera and has to flee from the local police, his battles with the authorities and the genuine love shown him by his pupils all have the seeds of fiction in them…but amazingly they are all true. This time his travels take a more serious turn as he gets beaten up by the military and the police attempt to blow up his car but Nick&#8217;s sardonic view of everything going on around him can bring humor to any situation and, as ever, his relationships with the opposite sex deliver him into ever more exciting situations… his penchant for getting involved with bizarre women smacks on genius! The first in this exciting series is: Going Around the Bend on the QE2.</p>
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		<title>Going Mad in the Middle East</title>
		<link>https://www.nicholaswalker.co.uk/product/going-mad-in-the-middle-east/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Nicholas Walker]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 30 Aug 2020 01:01:02 +0000</pubDate>
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					<description><![CDATA[Dr Ahmed shuffled the papers on the desk in front of him. It was the Colonel’s desk but the Colonel wasn’t speaking.

‘Apparently there is no permanent damage,’ Dr Ahmed was saying, ‘but he is in quite a lot of pain.’

‘Oh dear,’ said I.

‘We are very disappointed in you Dr Nick,’ said Dr Ahmed. ‘The Colonel is particularly angry with you and has no wish to speak with you at this moment.’

‘Oh dear,’ I repeated.

‘I particularly asked that you avoided confronting this man,’ said Dr Ahmed. ‘I told you that we were dealing with this matter.’

‘But surely you don’t believe that I would purposely go about burning another man’s testicles?’ I said. There came a strangled gasp from the Colonel who was sitting at the coffee table.

‘Dr Nick, I wish you would call them his private parts,’ said Dr Ahmed severely.

‘Ah not testicles?’ I said. ‘Private parts.’

Dr Ahmed winced at my bold language. ‘If you please Dr Nick.’

‘Righto,’ I said. ‘As I was saying you surely don’t believe that I would purposefully go about burning another man’s penis?’ I said and the Colonel found a sudden need to go and gaze out of the window at the car park.

‘Dr Nick!’

‘Sorry, I’m a scientist you see, I have been educated to use the correct scientific terms,’ I said. ‘Dr Ahmed, I understand that you questioned the other staff present about the incident…did any of them indicate this was anything other than an accident?’

‘You are well aware that they wouldn’t say anything against you,’ snapped Dr Ahmed. He shuffled the papers again. ‘This is an incident that could result in you losing your job here Dr Nick.’

‘No,’ said the Colonel from the window, the first word he had spoken. Dr Ahmed paused for a second then tried to regain his momentum:

‘Well, anyway, we will certainly have to get rid of the microwave as a safety measure,’ said Dr Ahmed and I could see even to him this seemed a pathetic response. He tried to rally, ‘I only hope you will take responsibility to the inconvenience you have put other people to.’

‘You mean when he tries to pee?’

‘Dr Nick! You are fully aware I am talking about the rest of the staff,’ he said very stroppily. ‘I don’t think there is anything more to be gained from continuing this conversation.’

‘Okay.’ I stood up, ‘Thank you Colonel, thankyou Dr Ahmed.’ I went to the door opened it then closed it behind me. Then I counted ten seconds and opened it again and stuck my head back inside.

‘Dr Ahmed?’

‘What now, Dr Nick?’

‘I just thought you should know it wasn’t all a total dead loss.’

‘It wasn’t?’

‘No…I managed to save at least half of my coffee,’ I said cheerily. ‘It was quite delicious.’

As I walked away down the corridor I could hear the gales of laughter from the Colonel and I could swear I could even hear Dr Ahmed joining in.

Funny thing, they never did get round to removing that microwave.

&#160;]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The fifth true travelogue in this best-selling series of the trouble prone eccentric who is not quite sane. Nick is back in Kuwait but he has left A’Takamul School and is working at the Ministry of Defence. He is still running his illegal dance club and upsetting the authorities with his campaigning on behalf of the Bedoon. True to form Nick’s penchant for getting into trouble follows him around: he is kidnapped at gunpoint, banned from ever using Emirates Airlines again, dances with a princess, is nearly flattened by a bulldozer, has to hide in the desert and is forced to smuggle himself and the omnipresent Emad into Iraq. All these incidents have the seeds of fiction in them but they are amazingly true, but Nick’s sardonic view of everything going on around him can bring humour to any situation. His relationships with the opposite sex once again lead to trouble but this time he meets a girl who is to become his wife and they run off to Bangkok to get married.</p>
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